Friday Survey!

 

Okay folks, it's time for Friday Survey!  Remember to keep score at home!

1.  A lawyer walks into court with no tie.  He tells the Judge "I'm sorry your Honor, I wasn't planning on being in court today, but something came up."  The Judge says "That's okay."  Ten minutes later, another lawyer walks into court with no tie.  He tells the Judge "I'm sorry your Honor, I didn't think I had court today."  The Judge rakes him over the coals.  What happened?

A.  The first lawyer really wasn't supposed to be in court that day; but the second was, and simply forgot.
B.  The Judge likes the first guy, and doesn't like the second.
C.  The Judge is getting senile.
D.  The Judge has smoked cigars and boozed with the first lawyer, and isn't familiar with the second.

2.  A lawyer asks an attendant in the Clerk's office for a document.  It's a document which would be invaluable to lawyers, but which lawyers are specifically not to have.  After some good-natured begging and flirting, she gives the document to the lawyer.  What happened?

A.  She was momentarily dazzled by the lawyer's inherent charm, and forgot her station.
B.  She makes $9.40 and hour, and doesn't give a f*ck.
C.  She secretly longs for attention, any attention, even attention from a scummy lawyer.
D.  This lawyer has complemented her on her new breast implants, has struck up a friendship with her, and now she regularly asks him what he thinks of this blouse, that blouse, this sweater, etc.

3.  One lawyer calls another lawyer, in order to ascertain why the second lawyer has filed a motion for sanctions.  After some discussion over the facts, and some heated discourse, the second lawyer agrees to withdraw his motion with prejudice, even though his client has demanded he file it.  What happened?

A.  Common sense and reason prevailed over emotion and client anger.  No, really!
B.  The first lawyer reminded the second that he knows where the second lawyer lives.
C.  Once all the facts were in, the second lawyer realized it would be a waste of time.
D.  Having just crushed the second lawyer in a case the second lawyer was supposed to win, the first lawyer explained just exactly how he was going to crush the second lawyer a second time.

Now let's add up our score! :
Give yourself one point for every "A", two for every "B", three for Every "C" and four for every "D".

Scale:
1-3        You're a fucking moron.
4-6        You must be a federal employee
7-9        You're not quite there, but I like the way you think
10-12     You're money baby, MONEY.

*incidentally, the correct answer to every question is "D".  Hey, I was there...