"Boobie Pillows"

Yay for Kern County, CA code!  Because I like Googling "boobie pillows" at 9:20 in the morning...

9.12.010 Public sales of articles depicting female breasts. (partial citation)

A. Finding of Fact Leading to Enactment. Residents of the county have petitioned the board of supervisors of the county to prevent persons who display, sell or offer to sell upholstered or stuffed articles depicting, simulating or caricaturing female breasts from vending such articles at sites adjacent to and near county highways. Those petitioners have represented, and this board of supervisors finds, that county highways regularly are traversed by adults and children who have no recourse except to use those highways going to and from school, to play and recreation, to stores, offices, churches, and otherwise following their daily activities, and that vending such articles adjacent to and near county highways is indecent, offensive to the senses, an unwarranted intrusion upon the right of adults and children freely to use the county highways in their legitimate comings and goings and to be free in such travels from vulgar, sexist and exploitative displays and exhibitions by the vendors thereof.

The petitioners have represented, and the board of supervisors finds, that (unlike indecent and vulgar displays in movies, newspapers, television and other places, the offensiveness of which can be prevented or controlled by turning off the set, canceling a subscription, declining to purchase, or nonattendance) the hawking of those articles named by its vendor and sold as “boobies pillows” along the public highways is a species of indecency and vulgarity which cannot be ignored or controlled by passersby, which assails the eyes and minds of all who are required to use county highways, and which should be barred and controlled for the peace, safety and welfare of the unincorporated areas of the county.

B. Display and and Sale Banned Within One Thousand (1,000) Feet of Highways.  No vendor shall vend stuffed articles depicting the female breasts (sold as "boobie pillows") within one thousand (1,000) feet of any county highway.